A Short Story..More to come...

Days that can make even the most well off man wish they were in my topsiders. It was a good day on the top deck of the MS Pride of America. The wind from starboard and the sun was dropping to our bow. There is nothing in this world that comes close to a sunset while underway. The sun casts a golden shadow across a sapphire and aqua sea. A mango sky perfectly contrasting the waters that lay ahead creates an almost surreal horizon. Reclining in a chair I take in everything controlling my breathing, slow and deliberate. I savor every second as the sun inches closer and closer to the azure water. As this natural phenomenon takes place the sky changes into a bright peach hue, with no clouds in the sky it is almost as if the entire sky is under a filtered light. Enjoying times such as these my mind fills with thoughts of the many seaman who were able to enjoy this same event through the ages. Though I am on a craft of Iron I can still close my eyes and try to place myself onto a wooden sailing vessel. I can almost smell the pitch and wood as my modern floating city roars on. It would be an amazing experience to sail without the drone of an engine. The only sounds filling the approaching night sky would be the bow breaking and the sails flapping as we came around to capture the wind. With night falling and the last shred of light disappearing over the horizon the lights on board the creaking vessel would cut, and a blanket of black would veil itself tightly around our small world in the center of the sea. As the day toils on a person it is the night which wears on a man as the day ends it is easy to find ones self moments away from loss of control. With a crew in a mindset such as this it is no doubt that some would light a pipe and share a story of rough seas and even rougher women at port. It is a difficult life for a sailor the rolling of the sea alone can drive a man to fever but the most difficult emotion to deal with is that of feeling alone. With confines tighter than the rigging on the main sail it is hard to imagine one feeling alone. But it is a possibility and a very real part of life. But to get many through this relying on the only real comfort is the knowledge that the next horizon will offer something new and different, and the crimes of the previous will be forgiven and forgotten. A heathenish bunch we are made to be and perhaps the combination of cook and sailor is only placing a grittier than average stigma on my head, which I am completely comfortable with. I like the notion that I am a gruff man who likes women and booze a little too much, perhaps that is correct, but If it is my lifestyle of choosing then I think it is I alone who must bear the weight of the mast. My friends let me inform you of this it is not a lifestyle of wealth and fame we are living; it is thankless and soul breaking at best. It is a environment in which nothing of your past life matters. The only thing that really counts is how you cope with your new reality. I find myself awakening to wonder what day it could be and further realizing that it makes not much matter what day or what year it could be. The positive is in waking up. This is a feat alone when it comes to this fantasy lifestyle. With unfriendly ports and infectious diseases it is only a matter of time before you too will succumb to the hands of the sea. She gives in many respects and takes in many more. She claims more than just the green and she roasts no bones about who will rest within her bowels. These waters we sail are warm and dangers abound. With each rising sun port may be in a number of secluded locations all on the exotic side and with many diversions that make it easy to become lost in the chaos. With the ship moored on a questionable pier in a very questionable port I know every man will find his form of pleasure. Be it lovers numerous as the fish that school in the tidal pools or perhaps a man will take to the drink, a swill on a harsh local cane wine that stings the senses even after it is consumed. But I find my pleasure from another. She is in every port and I know her to be safe and kind. She goes by the name of Lady and comes from the most remote regions of Asia. I know I have come close when I smell her sweet perfume hanging heavy in the air around a group of tranquil locals. I know while under her magical spell I can let the confines of the ship sail, and appreciate the luxury of sprawling my legs as we lay side by side drifting from one conciseness to another. Her passion takes me away to lands that even I dare not go, far beyond my furthest horizons. But my trust in her is strong and I am able to enjoy the times we are able to spend with each other. With my head occupied with other matters I drift away from my thatched bunker and make way through the clouded streets observing and appreciating all the movements happening all around me. Though the temptation of flesh is ever-present I still avoid and revel in the commotion of fruit vendors juggling freshly harvested papayas. The streets are narrow and the stalls are tightly packed with people and wares. In port we provision and replenish, at least that is what is supposed to happen. With the masses of people it is sometimes difficult to move and most do not make way for our type. With the intersecting corridors and the repetition of products it is easy to become lost within the inner sanctum of this living and breathing thing that seems to circulate like an uroburos. Coiled within these serpentine passages and colorful offerings lays a danger greater than the sea, but perhaps it is all in my head. As I stroll every face seems to have an untold air of danger to it. It feels as though I can look into people’s souls through their eyes. A man with a thin mustache and skin worn and tanned like a precious piece of leather seems to stare me down as I pass. His eyes hide barely peeking out of the brim of his woven hat. I can feel a connection between us though no words are shared. I have uneasiness about the man and truly think he is up to something less than pious. But with my fresh high I manage to put these fears aside and succumb to the moment and attempt to enjoy the day as it unfolds before me in a much more favorable light. Though the bustling streets of the port offer excitement and pleasure I find my eyes have become far too dizzy from the colors and movement, my mind is twisting from the sounds and compressed space, the face of the mustached man keeps reappearing and starts to make me wonder what the hell I got myself into. I need to find an area to decompress my head. Though my body is already relaxed I must seek an area to breath the fresh air and let my mind rest and the confines of the city cannot offer such. With a goal in mind I splash my parched face with water and being on my quest. Before I exit the cobbled streets I purchase necessary provisions for this conquest. With everything readily at hand finding what I need is not difficult even in my current mental capacity. With me I take citrus fruits and libations to quench the thirst. It is easy to become ill from heat in locations such as this. With my direction chosen I begin my trek. But to my fortune before I exit the city I am able to find more pure Lady, which I add to my purchases and place into my worn canvas rucksack and fasten the brass buckle finally exiting the city’s mass hysteria. The resulting factor from being in port for an extended time usually equates to a sluggish crew upon departure. I know I am no different, one must enjoy while they can for it is hard to say when the next port will be reached. Perhaps many overindulge but when the next day at sea comes one day to early it is a necessary thing to take advantage of time away from the dank confines of the crew bunk.

People I work with,,,,Here it goes

So following the path of Buddha is a hard one. It is near impossible for me to accept all people. I do find some peoples to be less than adequate and I find some to be irritating. Its not virtious nor acceptable but it happens. Some people I find alright to be around for a short time but any longer than a short time and I see the true nature of the people in question. They to me are sluggish and really when it comes to the end of the day do not finish hard. Its hard and sad to say but I cannot live in such close quarters with such people.. Nor would I really Invite some into my home.. but this is a generalization.. Many are nice and good people..but I find them to have strange ways of dealing with problems .. their mental connections are different than my own and I am not sure why but do not make me alright with some actions…Ok so now that I have said all that and will most likely look back on this with negative thoughts I must say that today was a more than challenging day of work. I am used to easy and nice Saturdays with relaxing walks and access to the beach and mostly a fun good time.. this Saturday was nothing like that.. it was like placing fish into a barrel with a hole in the bottom.. or wrangling a heard of sheep.. they each want to do something different than the objective. For instance The galley is a mess and were not progressing What is logical. Clean the galley and them progress. I found the galley was not clean and there was no progression. So it is to say that the most we accomplished today was gaining hours and not too much more. Now I am happy that I worked 10.5 hours on over time that makes me feel great. It’s basically 100 dollars added to my check but is that extra 100 worth the effort I expended..Perhaps? I did manage to have fun with it.. I was placed on a sandwich making task.. It was great! I was slanging mayo and slapping around mustard.. Good fun!! Perhaps a little too much fun. I treated the job with a joking attitude… shit I’m making sandwiches for Christ’s sake..It does not take too much brain function to do so..The person who was responsible for making these sandwhiches was basically a useless lump of meat when it comes to the kitchen.. I wonder about other aspects of her life as well.. This woman is a character, it takes her about 2 hours to cut a case of tomatoes and not a difficult cut just slices..I could understand if it were umm.. a rose or something I dunno even then I don’t think it would take that long.. any who she is fucking nuts..She was using the mandolin the other day and telling me a story about how she escaped Jeffery Daumier and basically she never reported it and later learned he was a killer..now I do not believe this story but it was fun to hear something so crazy for sure. So yea this woman basically sucks at kitchen work and well even pot scrubbing apparently.. Its kinda sad..Ohhh hahah.. another story..Im trying to contain a water spill and this same woman comes up to me trying get in my flooding galley I ask what she wants and I was not really listening..Come to find out she wants in my flooding galley to pour out water from a barrel now I have water spilling into the hall and this woman wants to add to it I could give two fucks what she wants let along dump water I tell her to dump the shit on the floor she does and the dingbat was complaining about no more than a cup of water..It was pitiful..I have more water in my shoes than this fucking green barrel.. and she wants to go into my galley just to empty the thing…For me the situation would have been common knowledge ..just dump the fucker on the floor they will never know the difference. Its silly really when it comes to who they hire into the galley..I am not sure if people lie a lot on there application or during their interview but with out question we have nearly 25 percent of people who should never be allowed to touch a pan let alone be trusted with a knife.. Another person John Garver a huge white Texan with highlighted blonde graying hair apparently used to work in the veg tomb on his last contract It has been said on the job he used to pack a huge wad of Dip and swallow the liquid.. That is bad but what is worse during his shift he used to fall a sleep. Not just daze out and slow down but literally fall a sleep standing up while cutting something..The man is fat fatter than he really should be and when he comes in the room it takes all my might to find pleasant thoughts. I do find many people to be fun. A chef in the crew mess galley is nicknamed fish mostly because he had worked in the fish butchery but partly because some think he looks like a fish I personally do not think the latter but do think he is a valueable asset to this staff.. He has a great attitude and a loud thundering voice that demands attention.. Though with these larger than life characteristics he is not that large of a person.. He is a ligher skinned black man and is gaining some age but still has it as a chef. He works hard and cooks with love and still has the passion.. From what I gather he has never attended school and I am proud to say that I am the same way. I home in my long career ahead of me that I will be able to do the same..being keep the passions and a positive attitude though all the shit that happens. Another chef that I find interesting is Joselito The execuitive sous chef for the Production galley..He is a tall man and with the toque only adds to his comical height.he walks with a wiggle and a flair to his wrist. His voice is very nasally His personality is one for the ages and thinking of him angry is not something I would like to do.. I am sure he can be serious but most of time time he maintains a light attitude towards the people working in his galleys

Breath of fresh air

So Its like Month one plus some days and I have found a new awakening of sorts… I have been more and more spiritual lately but not in the typical Catholic way..I am beginning to have curiosity is eastern religions specifically Buddhism. At the beginning of this adventure I decided to take the Teaching of Buddha from the nightstand from the hotel.. Mostly because it was something Ihad never seen before but also because I thought It would be an interesting way to spend some time.. well as time here has passed I have managed to be distracted and this book basically became crammed between my mattress and my wall. And there it still sits.. so why am I mentioning this and what is the meaning.. Ok so here it is.. I was visiting a friend and we were talking and I found amongst some clutter a book.. The title is odd “Girl seeks Bliss” Zen and the art of Modern Life Maintenance. So its basically book for women but I am still reading it and am coming to a lot of interesting realizations.. Its also teaching me a few things for instance did you know that at the same age of 24 Richard Gere also found Buddha.. I dunno kinda cool perhaps the age of 24 is the year one finds them selves or strikes out on there own path.. Its also said in Neil Youngs sound Old man. Old Man Take a look at your life I am a lot like you, old man take a look at your life 24 and there is so much more living life in a paradise that was only built for two…Seriously This is really cool perhaps the 24 was the ideal number.. Look at my life I am living in a paradise and it built for a lot more than two..So as I am reading this book it is talking a lot about spirituality and the such and really I am becoming more interested and I think it was meant that I found both of these books like my life was meant to include them.. Everything happens for a reason and perhaps this is just another.. Something that was stated later in the book really caught my eye.. It says “ New Buddha groupies are smart, slightly rebellious, Happiness seeking Humanitarians in their twenties and thirties who Are looking for spirituality through righteousness, and peace of mind without illusions.. Cumon is that me or what.. I think it hits the nail very close to the head.. I am thinking this would be the intended audience of the book so perhaps it Is not that of a coincidence at all.. Either way I am super pumped and really think this whole zen way of being can become a good way to relax. I really want to learn a lot about this religion and way of being I think it has a lot to offer me.. particularly when it comes to my line of work.. now I love what I do.. but it is a stressful type of job. So if I can still fill my passion at the same time I am able to be collected I think I will be much more successful when it comes to daily kitchen life.. also I think it would be a great jumping off point for my Masters classes.. I would have a reason to study in India/China..I could eat and write and meditate it would be an all encompassing education. I think it would not only give me a great sense of pride but also be humbling and emotional. So though it is in the Buddhist teaching that one must live in the moment for it is the only moment that matters I must think slightly into the future.. Now I acknowledge that things may change and that is ok and up to the universe to dictate however, If I keep this job and save money and stay debt free over the next few years perhaps one and a half I would have enough revenue to fund an academic trip to Thailand, or some such place to study this along with the cuisine and what it means..I already have some insight into the eating of these people but it would be amazing to really grasp the knowledge and be able to write scholastically of the topic even perhaps teach a class which would be quite amazing indeed.. I think something that I would be proud to tell my eventual children of…” If you knew what I know about the power of giving you would not let a single meal pass without sharing it in someway” That is soo true. I want that particular lifestyle.. Perhaps communistic in a way.. everyone shares and chips into the main goal.. I would love to live that way.. I have a many thing I want to do in life but a limited time to do it so basically it comes down to when and how.. Here and now is once again the answer..I am young and anything can happen in my life so why not grab the bull by the horns and just do something momentous with life..Not that I am not..I am sitting in the bunk of my cruise ship..That is a lot more than many people can say..I am taking charge of my life and making money..though not a lot some money and saving up for something special be it schooling in the future or be it a most interesting traveling experience..I think I must take time for adventure before I get too old..My roommate is 34 or 35 he is a great person and had seemingly done a great many thing in his life..I want to also share in that I want to be able to say Yes I did that too and you know it really was special..I do not want to say something along the lines of ohh that tour bus was nice I am sure glad I paid the extra 29.99 to get the audio tour..no that’s not it..I want to explore on my own and do it by my terms ..the only audio tour I want is the one created by the natural setting..the grass crunching between my toes..the tide raising up to rocks and crashing when it comes in and babbling as it retreats into the sea. I want to listen to the squeaking of shoes on a freshly polished marble floor. I want to experience life and I want it all now..I am able to wait I know I am but I know I want it all to happen to me and it would be even greater to find someone to share it with..However some of the best adventures I have faced I have faced alone and I am sure I will continue to find this to be true..

Scarlet Bigonias and a touch of the BLues

So some may say I am many things but in my heart of hearts I am what I am. I Have over these past weeks forgotten what makes me a unique person. I have lost my way and now I have found what makes me happy again. I have rediscovered my hippy roots. My hair is long and my style is what it is. I am a Dead Head. But the kind that has to hold down a job and be productive so I don’t smoke but might take something else. So here I am on a little raft in the middle of the sea and surrounded by many folks who like rap and such type of music. Well here I am on desolation row and I need to find some like hippies. I think I need some tshirts to show my style to say a lot without saying anything. I avoid drugs but love the people in the culture. Some of my best friends have come from such situations and I need to find them her. I am sure there are some here its impossible to imagine I am the only one. So over the next few weeks I am going to look for signs of the people I am in search of. So with the realization that I am a hip type person I must remember that I am also a alcohol free person. Its like a mind fuck though. To be me is to consume alcohol its been a part of my life for quite a while. So am I being true to me if I don’t drink at all? I know I was not an alcoholic but I did consume quite a bit of alcohol. So by not having any am I still the same person I was before I came here. Its a question that is best left to the persons with the white coats. But for me this is too good of a gig to blow it by blowing into a tube. I must remember that no what my mind twists to be alright I must avoid the hooch at least for the time I am here. I cannot afford to go home. To many people know I am here and Its not worth it to go back for something so stupid. I need to be smart and above all that. It is weird though. All my hero’s are drinkers smokers and evil doers. Its odd that I am living an exact opposite of the ideals they instill. Hmmm… So I thought this battery was supposed to last like 7 hours. Its fully charged and is about to die. I think its stupid. Well I dunno.. I don’t think anything is wrong with it but… geeze I really do not like technology sometimes. Its getting at times to be simpler and with that of a lesser quality… ghhh…well I am done with this for the moment I feel that the context of this text is moot… ciao

Words

Two words can do a lot for a person. I was feeling kind of low and dirty and, well, all the feelings a chef usually feels. But the something happened, I was at a bar what a surprise many would think but to all those people I must Inform I was not indulging in any form of Libation. So with the night dragging on and the crowd getting drunker and drunker I entered into a conversation about cooking surprise. Its my profession I am only expected to talk about it, and when you get X amount of chefs in a room there is bound to be cheffing conversations. So here I am talking about cooking with a sushi cook and he give me two words that helped me remember who I am and what I am here for. Now let me back up, these past few weeks have been great I must say, but I have been getting further and further distracted from my sole intent. My intent is to learn and push my intelligence level further up. So here it is I am becoming distracted with other things not really anything too intense but still I have been letting my mind wonder. So here it is this dude at the bar told to me Embrace It! No matter what just embrace it as it would be the most important thing and do it the best and that’s it. Now I have been doing a great job and people have recognized that. I was told I perform better than a multitude of people combined and I really hope to make everyone expect that from me. If I start letting people down It would not be good once I get out of this place. I want people to know I am a strong worker and am ready to take it to what ever level is necessary. So from the moment I heard embrace it. I really kept it turning in my mind. Its like a shot of adrenaline I could feel my body become ready and my heart rate rise it was an amazing pep talk and waking up this morning was like getting ready for a great day of battle I went in with an attitude of must do will do can do..DONE. It was a great day we killed vegetables and did it is a great time. I have a feeling that either a great many horrible cooks have passed through the vegetable rooms door or people really do not care of the job. Every job is important. It all matters. IT all Takes Time and IT must get done. If I keep this up and keep doing a good job I will be a Veg room manager in no time. Its only bound to happen. One man leaves tomorrow, another leaves in 2 weeks and yet another leaves in 2 months. Now with that 2 month time span I have plenty of time to learn the station in and out and take advantage of of it and hopefully will have someone working under me. Now If I cannot get to the top I want out ASAP! I would much rather be a muffin man and perfect biscuits and muffins than cut veggies all day. Though both jobs are hard and difficult being a baker not only sounds better on paper but also gets more respect from co-workers. Its amazing what saying I am a baker does to people its like some special honor, and I got it. So hopefully I can keep my baking privileges but if not I will be the best damn Onion cutter and doer of vegetables I can be. So things are good. My favourite sous Chef Erika is leaving for 3 months which is sad I really like her. But with that change comes different opportunities so I am excited to see what will happen over this upcoming rotation. So other than all this I am very excited for Saturday. It is the reprovision day and we have a bare minimum of prep to do. So with the speed we have been working I am hoping to be off the ship by 2 giving me much time to see the city of Honolulu Which I have yet to explore. AND Here I am able to buy cigars a necessary thing at the end of a day. It helps me clear my head and reflect on what is happening all around me. Well at this point I must go and take care of some business and after that probably relax on top deck and watch the sun set. What a great plan for the rest of this evening. Ok over and out.
Taste everything and regret nothing
3en~

KodaChrome

So there is an adage or saying that states.. a picture is worth or can say..a thousand words..but that is just the half of it..being there to take the picture is.. so much more.. and every day I am ALIVE is worth and is beyod a thousand words..Its odd though,.. I have scournful words, amazing words, and every such thing in between. I like very much to say that every day I can see the ocean.. I like very much I can say I took a random bus to Pa'ia and strolled the streets and talked to random hemp clothing sales people. I like that I can say I am almost sick of amazing sunsets.. How many people can say these words.. I am pleased with many things in my life.. I like that I can sit in the Maui mall and listen to the smiths over the loud speakers..Now with all this I like stuff I must inform you my valient reader that I do not like some aspects of my life.. They being that I do not get to stay in one place for longer than a few hours.. I would enjoy to just be here in this place for a few days just to explore a little deeper than a rough estimate of what is going on. But every day is a gift and every day I must exit the bowels of the ship and breath some "fresh" air. OS o9f late I did do some culinary adventure I had Lau Lau for the first time.. now for you that are not in the know this dish is traditional or a local taste.. its basically a fish and pork dish wraped in a green of sorts and cooked until all the flavours are mixed.. Its very mushy and well the pork was good but the butterfish really threw me off.. still good but I would say not for everyone.. also with this I had a homade banana bread.. now also good but slightly different.. instead of being totally mushy it was only soft on the top the rest was almost like a dryish pound cake.. interesting to say the least.. now to accuire these dishes I went into an "in-and-out" mart trype sitatuion,.. the folks spoke little english and well I must say a good eating adventure...Next Week I have plans to eat at a homke made udon noodle place..I am quite excited.. So I also went to a Hotdog place it was called Haute Dogg so I suppose it was good I dunno nothing like a chicago frank..the best part of the meal was provided by me.. I got a mango from provisions and well I must say it was the most perfect mango ever.. juicy and delicious and ripe..IT was a great treat on such a nice day.. after this I ran into my friend fish and RyaN and as a group we went to the beach and just chilled and loved life.. after that I went and just walked the streets of LuLu ITs a great city but I think I prefer something a little slower in pace.. so far Maui is my favourite Island though I have a shirt that says I heart Kuai.. Over all I am keeping this going just to make everyone back home want to be just like me so.. love me and eat your veggies...Ohh yea I work in the Veggie room I cut them all day so I have a slight affinity for them..
3en~